I like simple. Easy. Straight-forward. I don't like to over-think stuff. So when it comes to chasing the perfect "success" - which requires detailed planning, perfect execution, and no room for error... it all just seems like too much work. I'd never start. And if I did, what are my guarantees? It could take forever!
I much rather enjoy trying stuff as fast as I can, making changes, learning, and then trying again. In some cases, failing over and over and eventually hitting success, in other cases - letting go and trying something else. One of Richard and my heroes is leadership and management "guru" Tom Peters. Tom has said, "Whoever Tries The Most Stuff And Screws The Most Stuff Up The Fastest Wins" among other great points extolling the virtues of failing fast. For us, we'll just stick to failing our way to success. Avoiding failure is just too much work.
Monday, January 23, 2012
Monday, January 2, 2012
Fail Big, Fail Fast, Fail Well
If you want to make serious progress this year, take my advice and start failing. Seth Godin was interviewed on video a while back saying, "If I fail more than you do, I win."
Don't make 2012 the year you played it safe.
Fail Big. How? Look for outrageous projects, big clients, crazy ventures - and don't do anything unless it gives you butterflies in your stomach. When you have those... that's the test - you know it's big enough.
Fail Fast. Learn from your failures and make the adjustments quickly. Appreciate the failures and keep going and trying.
Fail Well. If you have a cat you know that they like to race around for a few minutes each day followed by hours of napping. So our cat, Courage, comes speeding through the living room toward his 6 foot cat tree. He springs up - flings his front legs into the air - claws out - prepared to grab onto the side of the perch. He totally misses the jump and falls backward. It was ugly and I saw the whole thing. Courage turned around and saw me; he was stunned. He rubbed his paw over his face a couple times and walked it off. Now that's failing well. It's gonna happen. People may even see it happen. Just walk it off. Try again better.
Don't make 2012 the year you played it safe.
Fail Big. How? Look for outrageous projects, big clients, crazy ventures - and don't do anything unless it gives you butterflies in your stomach. When you have those... that's the test - you know it's big enough.
Fail Fast. Learn from your failures and make the adjustments quickly. Appreciate the failures and keep going and trying.
Fail Well. If you have a cat you know that they like to race around for a few minutes each day followed by hours of napping. So our cat, Courage, comes speeding through the living room toward his 6 foot cat tree. He springs up - flings his front legs into the air - claws out - prepared to grab onto the side of the perch. He totally misses the jump and falls backward. It was ugly and I saw the whole thing. Courage turned around and saw me; he was stunned. He rubbed his paw over his face a couple times and walked it off. Now that's failing well. It's gonna happen. People may even see it happen. Just walk it off. Try again better.
Tuesday, November 1, 2011
25 Random Things About Me
- I have a bachelor of science in Criminal Justice and wanted to be a CSI before the public really had any idea what that was.
- The average room temperature I prefer is about 80 degrees. Then I am really comfortable.
- I don't have kids, I find women who do - amazing. Don't know how they do it.
- I called George Lucas' office when I was 8 years old because I wanted to produce movies with him. I had a Corona typewriter and typed up all the movies I wanted to make; including one called X-Caribbean-Tiger-Python about - you guessed it, what happens when a Tiger and Python combine in the jungle. (It's not good.)
- The absolute last thing I ever wanted to do in my life was speak in front of people, and now, I love speaking.
- I have incredible will power for almost everything except popcorn. I would eat a stranger's popcorn in the movie theater if they offered it to me. (and I was out, which I would be.)
- I wash my hair every other day. Every day is too much.
- I can be really judgmental and I am working on it.
- I don't like heights. I now live on the 22nd floor of a highrise building.
- I have, over time, become a total wine snob.
- I am becoming, more and more, a vegetarian. Wine luckily, is not meat-based.
- I believe I have ADHD, I literally do five things at once, and I mean, literally. I have done four things as I've been composing this blog.
- I believe everyone should experience therapy - at least for a bit.
- I am pretty sure my parents have no idea what I do, really. They will never read this.
- I have never gotten a speeding ticket. The only ticket I ever got was not stopping at a stop sign and that was a travesty of justice; the cop did not see me stop. I argued and lost.
- In High School, I skipped class and forged my Mom's signature on notes. I did get caught. It was not good. It was probably also why I had to retake Geometry.
- I love cats - I have one now, named Courage.
- I am believe in supporting our troops. I think the idea that our Government doesn't put their safety and recovery when they come back, as the first priority, tragic.
- I tolerate pedicures. I really don't like anyone touching my feet.
- I love talking to people, I find everyone has an interesting story if just ask them questions. It might be why I also enjoy twitter so much.
- I lived in Orange County California for the first 25 years of my life, then LA for a couple years, then the Pacific Northwest, and now Florida. I like to experience new places.
- I've been married twice, I got married at 20 and then at 27. My second husband Richard and I spend everyday together and it's perfect.
- I have a fondness for naps - the deep, delirious kind.
- I was the Training Director for a retail pet supply company based in LA, and I loved it. I know quite a bit about the life cycle of a flea, why corn is bad for cats, and that dogs love Greenies.
- I am doing what I love and I feel really lucky and very grateful everyday.
Sunday, October 23, 2011
Give the Gift of NO
"This is the book that we all wished we would have had 25 years ago (well, at least if you're near my age :). A most amazing book! Master this book and you'll master 'winning in life'. Success, wealth and achievement will virtually track you down and force themselves into your life. This book is not a book that is 'recommended'; this book is required reading for anyone wanting to pursue and live their dreams. Get it into your hands as fast as you can. You'll wonder how you've survived this long without it." - Michael Murphy, Author, Powerful Attitudes
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
The worst feeling in sales...
If you were to ask me what feeling I would most like to destroy, I know exactly what it is. I was thinking about some of the feelings I have had over the years when it comes to "selling."
The feeling that I would most like to destroy is... Doubt. You might respond, but what about fear? I actually think fear is pretty helpful in a lot of ways. It's such a strong emotion, in some ways - easier to manage. But Doubt is slippery. It sneaks in before you realize it - leans against the wall of your mind, in a black leather jacket, like a gangster from the 1950's, cigarette dangling, asking you, "Who do you think you are?" Doubt knows that it doesn't have to work that hard. It only needs to suggest things, in a subtle way, and then saunter off leaving you feeling uncertain; your confidence bullied out of the way.
And so when I think about 'Go for No' and the great results that it can bring people, I am most excited and hopeful that it can remove this most destructive of feelings. So when Doubt comes around you could say, "Oh I know - it's crazy that I think I can do this. It's okay I'm just going for No anyway. You can go now." And Doubt slinks away, head shaking, wondering how it lost it's grip on you.
The feeling that I would most like to destroy is... Doubt. You might respond, but what about fear? I actually think fear is pretty helpful in a lot of ways. It's such a strong emotion, in some ways - easier to manage. But Doubt is slippery. It sneaks in before you realize it - leans against the wall of your mind, in a black leather jacket, like a gangster from the 1950's, cigarette dangling, asking you, "Who do you think you are?" Doubt knows that it doesn't have to work that hard. It only needs to suggest things, in a subtle way, and then saunter off leaving you feeling uncertain; your confidence bullied out of the way.
And so when I think about 'Go for No' and the great results that it can bring people, I am most excited and hopeful that it can remove this most destructive of feelings. So when Doubt comes around you could say, "Oh I know - it's crazy that I think I can do this. It's okay I'm just going for No anyway. You can go now." And Doubt slinks away, head shaking, wondering how it lost it's grip on you.
Monday, October 3, 2011
A really important question...
When it comes to selling we have all been coached and trained to ask questions. Don't just talk and present - ask questions. Shut up and listen! Personally, my sales were not unleashed until I started focusing on the one really important question. It's the question that, when answered, takes me quickly and easily onto one of two paths.
The question is different for everyone. But whether you are offering cleaning services, upgrades on a website, selling life insurance or life coaching... there's the important question and it has to do with WANT. Some call it a disqualifying question.
Now I have to back up because I recently listened to a sales trainer's seminar about cold calling prospects. It started off with bringing up the weather to build rapport followed by a question that was complex enough that it reminded me of one of those essay questions about character arc that I would get on my literature test in high school.
Anywho, my point is - all that questioning is useless if you have not first figured out the want. So stop wasting your time and their time and begin asking the really important question: Do you want this?
The question is different for everyone. But whether you are offering cleaning services, upgrades on a website, selling life insurance or life coaching... there's the important question and it has to do with WANT. Some call it a disqualifying question.
Now I have to back up because I recently listened to a sales trainer's seminar about cold calling prospects. It started off with bringing up the weather to build rapport followed by a question that was complex enough that it reminded me of one of those essay questions about character arc that I would get on my literature test in high school.
Anywho, my point is - all that questioning is useless if you have not first figured out the want. So stop wasting your time and their time and begin asking the really important question: Do you want this?
Monday, September 5, 2011
Passion and Emotions when Selling
In his book, "How I Raised Myself From Failure To Success In Selling", Frank Bettger wrote: "I firmly believe enthusiasm is by far the biggest single factor in successful selling". Enthusiasm is one thing and you better have it!
But what about when your emotions get completely tied up in the sale… or non-sale? Granted, sales means money. And money is an emotional thing – it makes or breaks survival and defines lifestyle. So we can’t help but allow our feelings get in the way when it comes to sales. And yet, to be effective in virtually any endeavor, including sales, it is good to have less passion regarding the outcome of the situation. Not zero passion… but probably less passion than you’re experiencing currently.
Consider how a doctor must remain unemotional and somewhat dispassionate. It’s not that doctors are completely uncaring. Certainly if they are doing surgery - they care about the outcome, they care about the patient, but make no mistake: a certain amount of DETACHMENT is required to be effective. In fact, it is common practice not have doctors operate on relatives and loved ones. Why? Because they are too close, too emotional, to remain detached enough to do the job efficiently.
And the same is true for us as sellers, too. Our attachment to the outcome, tend to make us less effective. For example when it comes to selling, the ultimate place you can get to is where the words YES and NO contain the same emotional charge. And this means being more dispassionate when it comes to selling your product, service, opportunity, and even yourself.
There is no denying that there is some part of us that will always be happier when we hear ‘yes.’. After all, we’re human! We will never be able to be totally dispassionate about some outcomes. But the goal is clearly to reach a point where the difference between the elation of hearing ‘YES’ and the deflation of hearing NO is minimized… even if it can’t be eliminated entirely.
Anyone can be happy and positive when things are going their way. That’s easy! The question is: What is your attitude… how do you respond… when the going gets tough? When things do not go the way you’d like?
In poker, for example, players call a few bad hands “going on tilt.” Players are in control when they’re playing well and luck is with them. The question is, how well can they play and control their emotions when things aren’t going their way. Can they avoid going on tilt? The question is, when things don’t go your way… especially for extended periods of time… can you keep yourself from GOING ON TILT?
A few years ago the St. Louis Cardinals defeated the Detroit Tigers in the World Series. What makes this noteworthy is the performance of Cardinal shortstop David Eckstein. In his first 11 plate appearances, Eckstein went 0-11. He didn’t get his first hit until late in the third game. But, then he got 8 hits in his next 11 at bats - ending up 8 for 22 with a .364 batting average and being named series MVP. Even when things looked bad… were bad… Eckstein managed to keep his emotional in check and not go on tilt.
If you allow your successes … your yeses… to define your self-esteem… or to allow each result, each piece of good or bad news, to influence your thoughts and actions… life will become an emotional roller coaster ride with serious ups and downs that over time will drive you into a downward spiral of thoughts and actions. And it’s a very difficult cycle to get out of.
To be effective you must learn to separate yourself from what other people think and say and decide regarding your product or service… but to do so without becoming cold and nonchalant toward them. This is of course easier said than done.
Ironically, one of the side benefits of selling with less emotion is that others are actually drawn to us by our perceived lack of concern about the outcome. Too much emotion comes across as desperation. And customers don’t see desperation as a good sign. It does not instill a level of confidence in you or in the product. Ironically that causes the customer to back away and you lose the sale.
So get excited about your mission, about your product, and about LIFE. Let that come through. But when it comes to the excitement regarding the customer’s decision… that is when you need to relax and let the “chips fall” where they may.
But what about when your emotions get completely tied up in the sale… or non-sale? Granted, sales means money. And money is an emotional thing – it makes or breaks survival and defines lifestyle. So we can’t help but allow our feelings get in the way when it comes to sales. And yet, to be effective in virtually any endeavor, including sales, it is good to have less passion regarding the outcome of the situation. Not zero passion… but probably less passion than you’re experiencing currently.
Consider how a doctor must remain unemotional and somewhat dispassionate. It’s not that doctors are completely uncaring. Certainly if they are doing surgery - they care about the outcome, they care about the patient, but make no mistake: a certain amount of DETACHMENT is required to be effective. In fact, it is common practice not have doctors operate on relatives and loved ones. Why? Because they are too close, too emotional, to remain detached enough to do the job efficiently.
And the same is true for us as sellers, too. Our attachment to the outcome, tend to make us less effective. For example when it comes to selling, the ultimate place you can get to is where the words YES and NO contain the same emotional charge. And this means being more dispassionate when it comes to selling your product, service, opportunity, and even yourself.
There is no denying that there is some part of us that will always be happier when we hear ‘yes.’. After all, we’re human! We will never be able to be totally dispassionate about some outcomes. But the goal is clearly to reach a point where the difference between the elation of hearing ‘YES’ and the deflation of hearing NO is minimized… even if it can’t be eliminated entirely.
Anyone can be happy and positive when things are going their way. That’s easy! The question is: What is your attitude… how do you respond… when the going gets tough? When things do not go the way you’d like?
In poker, for example, players call a few bad hands “going on tilt.” Players are in control when they’re playing well and luck is with them. The question is, how well can they play and control their emotions when things aren’t going their way. Can they avoid going on tilt? The question is, when things don’t go your way… especially for extended periods of time… can you keep yourself from GOING ON TILT?
A few years ago the St. Louis Cardinals defeated the Detroit Tigers in the World Series. What makes this noteworthy is the performance of Cardinal shortstop David Eckstein. In his first 11 plate appearances, Eckstein went 0-11. He didn’t get his first hit until late in the third game. But, then he got 8 hits in his next 11 at bats - ending up 8 for 22 with a .364 batting average and being named series MVP. Even when things looked bad… were bad… Eckstein managed to keep his emotional in check and not go on tilt.
If you allow your successes … your yeses… to define your self-esteem… or to allow each result, each piece of good or bad news, to influence your thoughts and actions… life will become an emotional roller coaster ride with serious ups and downs that over time will drive you into a downward spiral of thoughts and actions. And it’s a very difficult cycle to get out of.
To be effective you must learn to separate yourself from what other people think and say and decide regarding your product or service… but to do so without becoming cold and nonchalant toward them. This is of course easier said than done.
Ironically, one of the side benefits of selling with less emotion is that others are actually drawn to us by our perceived lack of concern about the outcome. Too much emotion comes across as desperation. And customers don’t see desperation as a good sign. It does not instill a level of confidence in you or in the product. Ironically that causes the customer to back away and you lose the sale.
So get excited about your mission, about your product, and about LIFE. Let that come through. But when it comes to the excitement regarding the customer’s decision… that is when you need to relax and let the “chips fall” where they may.
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